Wednesday, January 4, 2012

back from the memorial service

The excellent wife and I have just returned (hours ago) from visiting my mother for my father's memorial service in Weaverville, outside Asheville, NC. We're both headache-y and tired from the ride (and from the week) and looking forward to sleeping in our own bed and eating normally (restaurant food is good, but I'm sure I've gotten way out of shape on a week of it).

Mother was grateful for our attendance, and for helping her get started going through my father's things. She forced some of his stuff on us, and other stuff I was happy to take away. I'm reading this text on a flat-panel, 17" monitor that my father had just taking up space in his basement; he didn't want to give up his smaller CRT. I don't get it.

Some things I learned this week:
  1. My father accumulated an awful lot of stuff. Much of it became useless immediately upon his death; other stuff was just junk. Some has some value, but some of that only has value to certain people, either because only they have the skills to put it to use, or for sentimental reasons, or whatever.
  2. Sentimental value is overrated.
  3. The property distribution of a dead relative brings out the worst in some of us. When my brother-in-law was last at my father's house, he took a quantity of my dad's tools with him. I have no use for that stuff, nor do I want to give it house room... nonetheless, for a few seconds, my nose was severely out of joint: how dare he just take that stuff, without even discussing it with me? I had to make a point of letting that go.
  4. Seeing the stuff my dad kept, I have resolved to get rid of some of my own junk. There are two drawers at home, in particular, about 90% of the contents of which is stuff even I would say is useless.
  5. I now have a lifetime supply of jackknives.
I'm sure I didn't learn it this week, but it's nonetheless true: this would have sucked WAY worse if the excellent wife 1) had not been along, and 2) hadn't been so excellent. I told her that a number of times this week, and now I'm telling you.

I'll plan to go in to work for a short time tomorrow to catch up on some paperwork. This weekend, I see OLPH has a ride scheduled, as does Winter Larry, and the weather might hold for both. I'm hoping to pedal away some emotional weirdness.

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